Author Topic: More Random Babbling: 2015  (Read 7548 times)

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #30 on: September 18, 2015, 08:10:46 PM »
"Colorful balloons" eh? They're smileys:hammerhead:

Anyway. Once in a while I'll be tormented by cable TV car shows. While I'm not a car guy by any means (one might argue that I'm barely human at all), my favorite is Counting Cars...meaning, it's the only one I'll actually watch all the way through. ::)   (One other with some appeal is All Girls Garage, but it confuses me: I keep thinking it should feature babes in bikinis fixing cars, but it doesn't. So I avoid it entirely to save myself the confusion.)

Unfortunately, sometimes Canadian and British car shows are thrown into the mix...the Canadian shows are almost -- almost -- indistinguishable from the American shows, but it's the British shows that can be somewhat irritating. For example, a slightly enhanced (by me) snippet from something I overheard:

"Yes, I have this aluminum (pronounced "allumineeum") wing that I'll attach to the boot, which as you may know is is directly opposite the bonnet."

...to which I replied, "Right. Then I'll finish my pinky-and-perky, grab my brolly, nip 'round the corner, take the lift up to my flat and watch the telly!"

I admit, I was in a rather bad mood at the time.
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #31 on: September 19, 2015, 11:26:07 PM »
On some show the other day, I saw a cafe named "Cafe du Monde."

Well, I thought to myself, that's certainly better than "Cafe Mon Dieu"...

I think I need sleep.
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #32 on: October 09, 2015, 10:45:44 AM »
How To Get Doom/Ultimate Doom/Doom II/Final Doom Running On Modern Computers

1. Acquire sharp knife.

2. Acquire small child.

3. Place screaming child before keyboard.

4. Plunge sharp knife into small child's tiny little heart.

5. Stifle compulsion to laugh maniacally. This is serious, goddammit.

6. Drain child's blood into keyboard.

7. Google "zdoom".

8. Achieve all of the many steps necessary to download and install zDoom. (Estimated time required: six soul-sucking days and just as many bitterly sleepless nights.)

9. Play Doom.

NOTE:  If your local laws render child sacrifice illegal, feel free to substitute a yappy little dog, such as your neighbor's Pomeranian.


How To Get Master Levels Of Doom II/Quake 2 Mission Packs Running On Modern Computers

1. Take sharp knife from the previous tutorial and plunge it into your own neck, right under your jaw. You may not inflict a mortal wound upon yourself, but it will deter you from wasting your time on such frivolous nonsense.


How To Avoid A Police Investigation When Your Tutorial Encourages Harming Children And/Or Small Animals

1. Say "Just kidding!" like you really, truly mean it.

2. You don't have to mean it. Just the mere show of contrition is enough.

NOTE: This applies to many things in life, such as DUI resulting in multiple grade-schooler deaths, boning your wife's sister AND her mother in one frantic, delightful afternoon of passion, and putting your butthole directly on your customer's entree. These can all be solved with puppy dog eyes, a pooched-out lower lip, and a tearful "I'm really, REALLY sorry!"
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #33 on: October 28, 2015, 09:18:41 AM »
Nothing to say, really...as is usual...but I just like seeing those little new post pumpkins light up. :angel:

Oh, here's something. A trivia question really.

Q: Why do they put MSG in most of our food?

A: Because opium is illegal.

Also, I'm working on a proposal involving the yearly ritual sacrifice of a Jenner/Kardashian. When the news articles on my Yahoo page feature no less than six J/K-related articles at any given moment, it's either time to get rid of Yahoo, or ramp up the process for a grand, yet gruesome engine of blood sacrifice. The fact that we will never entirely wipe them out is not an issue; those hirsute horrors breed like rats. We shall have plenty of them for the grim -- yet oddly enjoyable! -- slaughter ahead.

No, the only problem is: WHICH awe-inspiring supernatural entity would accept the offering? Because clearly, the J/K clan is the best scheme that Hell has squeezed out of its fiery rectum since Paris Hilton. So we need to bypass Satan and find someone else. But whom? Who (or, more accurately, WHAT) has the power and ultimate overall chutzpah to accept the blood of the not-so-innocent and still bestow dark powers upon us? Or, more precisely, me?

This means research. The wearisome, unceasingly monomaniacal agony of poring through countless religious/spiritual texts to find the diabolical omnipotent entity of my dreams...

Ehhh...maybe it'd be easier just to get rid of my Yahoo page. :ss-kickcan
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Doc_Brown

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #34 on: October 28, 2015, 10:25:37 AM »
Ehhh...maybe it'd be easier just to get rid of my Yahoo page. :ss-kickcan

I actually just did that.  There was an article in my news feed, for instance, that auto-played a video of a fight at a school.  Now, I didn't want to see that, so I clicked pause on it.  Only problem is, if you scroll through the news feed and come back across it, it starts auto-playing again.  So not only will they play videos without getting your permission, they'll play videos even after you've denied them permission.

Then I went into the article's tags and deselected categories such as "crime & justice" and "social media".  Lo and behold, the article shows up again later--only this time it's tagged as "schools" and "education" instead.  Not to mention the times Yahoo will seem to forget you're logged in and go back to the default news feed.  Oh look, it's back again.  Oh look, the "crime & justice" tag is red--meaning this article shouldn't show up.

I don't get it.  If it worked the way it was supposed to you could have a news feed of only articles you'd be interested in.  That would mean you'd be more likely to click on those articles, be taken to a new page, and Yahoo would get the increased page views.  Instead, their system is so broken that it drives users away from their site, costing them a significant amount of ad revenue.

No, the only problem is: WHICH awe-inspiring supernatural entity would accept the offering?

:coolcthulhu:
Roads?  Where we're going we don't need roads.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #35 on: October 29, 2015, 09:14:45 AM »
They're desperate, I think. What with ad-blockers making it tough for them to run scripts and other crap, they're resorting to underhanded tactics...

...probably just a little paranoid there. I should probably think about things before I commit them to print. But why start now?

Somewhat related to that are the problems I face when using Firefox, but that's my fault, I suppose. I use NoScript and an ad-blocker (more on that in a moment), and certain sites (like Taco Bell's) will not work at all, even if I allow specific scripts to run. So sometimes I have to switch to another browser entirely (but not IE. Never IE.). Pale Moon, for example, which is for all accounts "where Firefox should be right now." Don't ask me what that means. It falls beyond my Sphere Of Caring.

As for the ad-blocker, I switched over to uBlock, which works better than AdBlock Plus and/or AdBlock Edge, especially since their owners have sold out and allow "certain" ads to run. [...which then brings up the whole ad-blocking app thing with cellphones, but my experience with that problem is severely limited. Neo-Luddites don't have fancy phones.]

But that does beg the question: how can high-traffic sites keep running without revenue generated by ads? Personally, I don't click on ads at all...but I've always been a Taker and not a Giver and always will be. I suppose the future of the internet relies upon others: those unwitting individuals who will deliberately click on a banner offering laser printer ink cartridges for $29.95.

Now, for sites like the Nexus, I would consider "supporting" [their word] them with a yearly subscription. But since I'm the type of clown who still uses the shareware versions of Fraps and WinRar, saying "well...maybe someday I'll buy a license," it doesn't bode well for them. Although, the feeling of misanthropy is exhiliarating when someone points out that I represent the inevitable death of freedom.

Quote
:coolcthulhu:

Well...yes. There's Him. But since I already have Him working on taking out my neighbor's dog (quote: "YARK! YARK! YARK! YARK!" [repeat constantly and forever]), I thought I'd give Him a rest this time. Besides, He is being very slow about the whole thing. I mean, really: what's so hard about sending out one Night Gaunt to snatch the little bastard from its yard to consume it like an in-flight snack??
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #36 on: October 29, 2015, 03:24:57 PM »
I was thinking of trying Firehouse Subs for dinner, but I was disappointed that they didn't have a sandwich called "The Dalmatian."
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #37 on: November 01, 2015, 01:18:19 AM »
The neighbor's dog.

Yark!

Yark!

Yark!

Yarkyarkyark!

Yark-yark! Yark-yark!

I hope its little heart explodes.
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #38 on: November 01, 2015, 09:03:26 PM »
Okay, okay, okay...the *chronological* order of the Fast & Furious movies: 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 3, 7.

...no point, I'm just putting this here as a reminder to myself to avoid the following "hilarity":


THEM: Which one are you watching?

ME: The third one.

THEM: Oh. Fast & Furious?

ME: No, Tokyo Drift.

THEM: But that's the sixth one.

ME: Chronologically speaking, yes.

THEM: So why are you watching them out of order?

ME: Why do you assume I'm watching them out of order? I could've just watched #6, for all you know.

THEM: But this IS the sixth one!

ME: That's it. This sample conversation is over.
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Doc_Brown

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #39 on: November 02, 2015, 09:27:23 AM »
The neighbor's dog.

I live at an apartment complex, right next to the grassy area where one of the residents will bring her yappy little lapdogs.  Nothing like being woken up in the middle of the night to hear them barking at someone coming home late.  And the best part?  Her reaction to her dogs barking:

"Hey!"  *CLAP CLAP*  "Hey!  Stop it!"  *CLAP CLAP CLAP*  "You get over here right now!"  *stomps feet*

My advice?  Get a fan.  A noisy one.  The white noise will drown those little bastards right out.
Roads?  Where we're going we don't need roads.

Offline Starfox

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #40 on: November 02, 2015, 03:00:36 PM »
Quote
My advice?  Get a fan.  A noisy one.  The white noise will drown those little bastards right out.

No kidding. I had a similar problem once and solve it the same way. Fan noise rocks. What is disturbing are uneven sounds. A fan produces constantly the same sound so is easily tuned out by the brain while keeping the other annoying sounds at bay (provided you choose and adequately loud fan). Computer fans will do too -- if you don't have an hyper quiet setup -- but it's quite a draw on the electricity bill to let a computer running 24/24H so I wouldn't recommend it on the long term.


Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world. -- A. Einstein

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #41 on: November 04, 2015, 01:57:07 PM »
Unfortunately, I have a quiet case. I mean, it's unfortunate in the given circumstances, not...never mind.

Fans? I got fans. Yes indeed, boys. I have a 16" shop fan and a 20" shop fan; the 20" sounds like a Cessna going balls to the wall. I also have two small desk fans, a larger desk fan, and a 14" fan that's really loud but just stirs the dust slightly. The other items in my arsenal include earplugs and headphones that are not in any way close to being noise-cancelling. I think my greatest desire at this point is perfect, unbroken silence.

...and I probably should put out some milk and cookies for Santa this year.  ::)

Most of the problem here is this nice little tinnitus thing I have going on, which makes me a bit more irritated than usual when it comes to noise. In fact, Tex Avery produced the perfect example of how I react to noise:

A clip from Rock-A-Bye Bear.

There's not a lot of exaggeration there. But the trick is finding a fan that doesn't set up a sympathetic harmony -- or worse, contrapuntal chaos -- with the ringing in my ears to produce the kind of rage you only hear about in Norse myths.

But I'll keep experimenting. Not with an icepick, no...if I render myself completely deaf, I'll have to just *remember* how my favorite songs went, and my memory's just not that reliable.

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"Hey!"  *CLAP CLAP*  "Hey!  Stop it!"  *CLAP CLAP CLAP*  "You get over here right now!"  *stomps feet*

My aunt was like that with her stupid poodle. That little monster would freak out and she'd be screaming "IZZY!" [for that was the loathsome vermin's name] "IZZY! SHUT UP! IZZY!"

"You're worse than the goddamn dog," I'd snarl.

I was never so happy about the demise of an animal when that horrid thing finally dropped dead. Then she got another poodle. ("MAGGIE! MAGGIE! SHUT UP! MAGGIE!") I don't see my aunt that often.
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Starfox

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #42 on: November 05, 2015, 08:36:04 AM »
You know what puts me to sleep? Vaccum cleaners  :purplelaugh: And not the Dyson hyper quiet type either. The loud one.

Not even kidding.


Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world. -- A. Einstein

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #43 on: November 08, 2015, 11:56:09 AM »
Vaccuums...yeah, I know what you're talking about. Also: air conditioning units, distant traffic, lawnmowers, and televised football.  :lol:

Let's see...what do I have cluttering up my headspace lately? Besides that. Although to be honest, if I were entirely free of that, I'd be transparent. :hammerhead:

Well, they had a Fallout 4 launch party, complete with celebs...but the best they managed to scrape up were Halle Berry and Kaley Cuoco. I mean, not even one lesser Jenner/Kardashian was in sight.

[Side Note: I'm lobbying to apply a universally-accepted name to a herd of Jenner/Kardashians. As a flock of crows is a "murder," and a group of whales is a "pod," I submit that a group of J/Ks should be called a "tumor."]

Ah, well. Maybe the next Bethesda game's launch party will feature the Aniston vs. Jolie spittin'-scratchin'-hair pullin'-eye gougin' Red Carpet bitchfight we've all been praying for all these years.

[Another Side Note: although Ms. Aniston is reasonably fit and could most likely take care of herself in a straight-up fight, I suspect that Ms. Jolie, being totally batshit, is a dirty fighter. Things to look for in the fight: "Look out! She's got a shiv!" and "Holy shit...I never thought I'd see someone pop out a woman's eyeball and just...just...eat it, like that, just like a grape..."]

Until then, however, this is what we have:
Winning an Oscar means never having to put any effort into your craft ever again.

Perhaps just a "mere" TV star, but she's pulling down a million bucks an episode.


Other stuff...

Doom 3:

Yeah...crank those texture settings UP, dawg! See the...the...son of a BITCH.

I imagine this would've looked perfectly okay five years ago.  ::)

#1: I wouldn't have had to enable the console if you asswipes had bugfixed a certain level, and
#2: Who gives a rat's ass about achievements, anyway??

Seriously. The BFG Edition nerfed the console so that you have to edit an .ini to use it. I got stuck in a level behind a door that would not open. It was supposed to lock behind me as I walked into the room, you know, id's dipshit method of panicking the player. I backpedaled into the hallway before the door shut, because...well, wouldn't YOU jump back if a Revenant screamed at you and fired a couple of rockets at your head? The door shut...and it was locked. That's when I found out that the pinheads had screwed with the console, because the only way out was to either load an earlier save, or clip through the damned door.

As a result, the game began bitching at me whenever I gained an achievement, because I still had the console enabled in the .ini. I didn't care enough to take it out.

I feel your pain.

Indeed.


Fallout New Vegas:

Raven-Symone goes to Vegas.

Blech. I've spent so much time trying to get my character presets sorted out that I just don't want to look at FNV anymore. Or ever again. I'm sick of it. I produced a fairly good-looking FO3 character, but porting her to FNV was...flawed, to put it mildly. FNV makes good characters ugly. Tell Obsidian I said that. The bastards.


Rage


A cute girl in Wellspring.



Look at that quality. Yesiree, that's high-def rendering right there, boy.

The whole megatextures thing is reason enough to ban John Carmack from games forever.


Skyrim

So she got stuck in the bookcase and I killed the shit out of her.


Dead Babette. I had to install and juggle the settings of at least three different large-scale mods and two patches to make this moment possible. But I think it was worth it.  :evil1:



It's not like they're close in appearance...but now I realize that I've been watching Constance Wu far too closely on Fresh Off The Boat:ss-facepalm
An interview with Kim Kardashian? Who wants to see that? I'd rather see an interview with the mortician's assistant who had to piece her head back together so they could have an open-casket funeral.

Offline Starfox

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Re: More Random Babbling: 2015
« Reply #44 on: November 09, 2015, 01:42:28 PM »
Regarding Fallout 4, interesting fact... On Amazon France, the Steam code for Fallout 4 is sold €59.99 so basically the same price as if one buy directly from Steam BUT (and that's the interesting part) the DVD version is sold €39.99. So one gets a box, DVDs and possibly a manual for €20 less than the digital version that is... well... digital. So basically the cost of the digital are reduced -- no shipping and handling, no printing, no packaging -- and however it is much more expensive than the common DVD version.

I could ask why such weirdness but I already know so I don't care... Of course buying the DVD version might mean that I won't have the original voicing -- I've never known Bethesda to publish several language versions on a same disc -- but for €20 difference? What the heck, for once I'm inclined to take the thing in my native tongue (and see if the atrocious French voice acting improved with the years).

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Perhaps just a "mere" TV star, but she's pulling down a million bucks an episode.

Friends actors were already pulling $1 million an episode and that was 12 years ago... So considering the inflation I'd say she's underpaid  :purplelaugh:

Quote
although Ms. Aniston is reasonably fit and could most likely take care of herself in a straight-up fight, I suspect that Ms. Jolie, being totally batshit, is a dirty fighter.

That may be but we have a saying here which goes like -- loosely translated -- "Beware of dormant waters". Meaning that it's generally the ones who seems to pose no threat who end up being suddenly lethal while the ones who keep barking end up cowering in a corner when the time comes.

Quote
Look at that quality. Yesiree, that's high-def rendering right there, boy.

And if you ever play the new Wolfenstein you'll end up with more of that high quality. Dear Id Tech 5, you sucked in 2011, you still suck today. And you'll still suck in the next DooM but apparently Bethesda doesn't care.


Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world. -- A. Einstein

 

everything