Author Topic: Cyberpunk 2077  (Read 763 times)

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: Cyberpunk 2077
« Reply #45 on: July 09, 2021, 06:08:31 PM »
Whoops. I've been so focused on mass effect (original) that I forgot that everything else (seasoned food, the internet, et al) existed.  :hammerhead:

I read somewhere that at least one of the CDPR devs is happy where the game stands now; apparently it's now where it should have been, had they the time to finish it in the first place.

I find this conclusion somewhat confusing for some reason, but never mind my muddled cognitive "skills."

Anyway, I read somewhere -- obviously I am so plugged into well-documented sources that I don't need to cite them at all  -- that they're at the point where a big update's on the way and free DLC isn't far behind.

Great, if true, but...will it be enough to get me to reinstall everything?

But I'm probably just being a pessimist again.

Nudity:

Public: Um...hey, there's a problem here. You--
CDPR: THERE IS NO PROBLEM.
Public: No, there is. It's--
CDPR: THERE IS NO PROBLEM.
Public: Are you kidding me with this crap?
CDPR: THERE IS NO PROBLEM. WE ARE IN COMPLETE CONTROL. THERE IS NO BUG. THAT IS ALL.
Public: But--
CDPR: THAT. IS. ALL.

I think they just don't want to admit that they're having trouble implementing a physics-enabled first person weiner.

CHANGELOG:
+ Fixed an issue where the player's dick kept smacking Judy in the face during conversations, regardless of lower body clothing choice. As this is a serious attack (perhaps even a hate crime!) and a complete disregard of her distaste for all things penile, we had no choice but to validate her feelings and utterly emasculate players using the "male" pronoun. See the final note below for more changes related to this decision.
+ Pride Month Update: The rainbow flag on Claire's truck has now been enlarged enough to cover the entire vehicle.
+ Related gameplay change: the player, regardless of gender pronoun designation, will no longer engage in violent races against others, but will instead be tasked with participating in pronoun-free affirmation parades that are -- and correctly so -- mandatory for the completion of the game itself.
+ Finally, lighter-skin tones and the entire male gender have been removed from the game completely, as have heterosexual romance options. This is a temporary hotfix (no pun nor insult intended towards players undergoing transition). We apologize to the players with "male" genitalia who identify as "female"; we are working towards a series of solutions that please each and every individual player, regardless of how "out there" a player's desired configuration may seem to narrow-minded racists.

ANYWAY.

Personally, I opt for underwear on my V, as I cannot feel comfortable knowing that he or she is going full commando in leather pants. Think about it.  :ss-weird1

It's just another in my long line of weird hangups, I admit.

The "secret" ending:

"You will need to make these specific decisions, without variation, and meet these specific requirements throughout the dozens of hours you'll be playing the game, in order to get this particularly shitty ending. Please refer to the spreadsheet provided...and please do not send any more death threats."

Quote
That's possibly one of those language mysteries that cannot be truly translated; you know, lost in translation and all that.

True; sometimes something just *is*... It's like jazz: if you gotta ask, you'll never know.

It is funny, though, when some egghead with a notepad starts asking questions.

"What does this phrase mean?"
"You don't want to know."
[scribbling furiously] "'...want...to...know.' Got it. Thanks!"
"Wait, it--oh, forget it. Have a nice day, white man." [malicious Native chuckling]
It is the scent of garlic that lingers on my chocolate fingers