Author Topic: Random Crap 2021: The Downward Spiral Of Our Days  (Read 458 times)

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: Random Crap 2021: The Downward Spiral Of Our Days
« Reply #15 on: April 25, 2021, 03:34:13 AM »
Air fryer + corn dogs = success! From what I've been told, there are other foods I can cook in the thing. I must investigate this intriguing notion, as it seems like this could be useful in the future.

Had a good idea for a wake-up alarm: the footstep chain sound of the Haunt from Thief. You'll go from "...zzzzzz ma i don wanna go school zzzzzz..." to "I'm UP, goddammit! Pants? Who needs 'em!" in the blink of an eye. In fact, the Haunt sounds are a treasure trove for just that specific use. Caution: specific sounds may result in person-shaped holes in your walls.

[Inspiration: an audio hallucination at 2am. At least, I *think* it was just a brain blip. All I know is I'm not in any rush to get back to sleep now.]

Subject shift: The Nexus. You see this a lot: someone makes a mod. Person A praises the mod. Person B shits all over it. Person C makes a baffling demand that is far beyond the scope of the mod. Person D "wishes" (passive-aggressively) that the mod also did several other things. Person E can't figure out how to install the mod, despite the installation instructions being in a clean, size 48 font. Person F blames the mod for crashing his game; it turns out the person has another mod (or mods) installed that are the culprit (count on at least 300 back-and-forth messages between the idiot and an increasingly-frustrated and bewildered modder before that conclusion is reached). Person G can't figure out the caps-lock key. Person H cannot figure out the English language. Person I cannot figure out humans' languages in general. Person J accuses the modder of stealing assets from some other mod. Person K accuses the modder of stealing HIS mod. Person L wants everyone to just give peace a chance. Person M wants to know if it will work on a pirated game and is quickly banned. Person N demands that the modder tailor the mod to his exacting specifications. Person O is new to this whole modding thing and is so confused by nomenclature that he's convinced that installing mods makes him a "modder." Person P is female and quickly regrets allowing that detail to slip. Persons Q through Y simp out on her and scare the living shit out of the poor woman. Persons Z through CC threaten her life and/or generally make the rest of the male gender wish that those assholes had been boiled in the womb. Person DD is having a bad day and believes that everyone needs to be privy to their drama. Person EE...

...it goes on like that, forever.

EDIT: minor changes. :ss-kickcan
« Last Edit: April 26, 2021, 07:21:12 PM by Silver Sorrow »
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Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: Random Crap 2021: The Downward Spiral Of Our Days
« Reply #16 on: April 26, 2021, 08:26:31 PM »
Well, my computer speakers finally crapped out. After only sixteen years, my Logitech R530's just don't work right anymore. Damn this planned obsolesence nonsense! Why, back in my day our speakers worked for decades before they started making a grinding noise in the center satellite! Of course, we had bigger problems to worry about, what with the velociraptors hunting us down or the Tyrannosaurs scooping us up like chicken mcnuggets as we ran, but our speakers lasted, by Ooga Booga's grace!

Anyway, for a temporary solution I went digging through my Closet O' Obsolete Tech, and I found a 2.1 set of Harman/Kardon speakers -- HK695's (ChampagneSE) -- that my dad had at work...it was only after going through the torment of hooking them up and hitting the power switch that I realized why they had been unceremoniously dumped in a box. Now, I know the man never threw anything away, but I'm getting a little tired of being the one to figure out how much of this crap works or is truly broken. So those go in the trash.

So I went back...further back...into the closet and found an old pair of Altec Lansings. I don't think they even HAD a subwoofer, although there's a plug for one. Also...they were white once, but have begun to turn ivory from age. Irrelevant. Point is: they work. They don't sound the best, given that I'm used to an additional two sources of sound, but they convey sound in general adequately enough. "When The Levee Breaks," however, does not carry the same punch it used to.

(And on a side note: while my Logitechs were 5.1, I never used the two "rear" satellites, as 1) it meant more wires to trip over, and 2) I sit with my back to a wall and placing them was awkward. For a while there, I did find use for a couple of those giant seasonal popcorn tins my mother never threw away -- one with a black cat sitting in candy corn and a fuzzy wuzzy easter bunny on the other -- but I kept tripping over those AND the wires every single time.)

So I headed for Amazon. Hey, Logitech z623 400 watt speakers...2.1? Fantastic. I don't need anything fancy. Just two satellites and a subwoofer. (That came out "wubsoofer"; hooray for the self-taught typists of the world!) And just $99? Well, put that right in my cart, and...

...what the bleeding hell do you mean you won't deliver them until June 5th??

Okay, screw Amazon. I'm goin' to Best Buy. Same price AND they'll have it here by Wednesday? Well now.

Note to self: stop buying tech...or anything important, really...from Amazon. I had to replace my Blu-ray player recently and they omitted to mention that I need a LAN cable for it to work with my stupid network. It's not that I don't have one; I have tons of them...somewhere. The trick is finding the box I stuffed 'em in. No, the problem is that they tend to "forget" things like that.

Also, Amazon's weird: in my ongoing effort to kill time, I've been putting my old drum kit back together (I've been working on this for years; drum stuff is goddamn expensive, don't let anyone tell you otherwise), and my latest project was to put SilentStroke (mesh) heads and black Evans reso heads on my 8" and 10" rack toms. (That I had to also replace my double tom holder due to cheap hardware decrepitude is outside the scope of this tiresome tale.)

Explanation: merely putting mesh heads on drums works, but if you put resonant heads (bottom heads) on as well, you get at least SOME sound out of them. I just don't want to piss off my neighbors more than I already do with just my mere existence.

Anyway, Amazon had black Evans heads listed, and like a complete clown, I ordered some. The 8" arrived fine, but the 10" was a couple days late, and the packaging seemed rather...small. Upon further inspection, it became rather obvious that this was not a 10" black drum head, but rather a CLEAR 6" head.

Hmmmm.

I ask for a replacement. "Sure thing!" they seem to gush. "A replacement is on the way!" And they give me a return code for the horse condom they sent me. I don't have to pay for the return, but I do have to drag ass halfway across town to the UPS store. Should charge 'em for gas, the bastards.

So a couple days later, the replacement arrives. Yay, right? No! It's a 10" head, but...it's blue. It's an Evans blue hydraulic head.

Just FYI: the hydraulic series is a two-ply head with a layer of oil between the plies; it's meant to elicit a darker, "wet" sound from the drum...a more "controlled" sound that doesn't need as much dampening to reduce ring. Now, I had used those at one time -- back in my youth, when we needed to spook the velociraptors away from our miserable mud-based dwellings -- but this isn't what I need now.

So I contact Amazon, politely pointing out that in my concept of life, it's TWO strikes before they're considered out. They didn't offer to replace it, instead just sending me a refund (which will probably show up in a mere 6 to 8 weeks) and giving me a return code for the wrong thing they just sent. I, being an intellectual of the highest degree...and also enjoying a life wracked with chronic exhaustion...had decided to see if they got the replacement right before returning the first wrong thing. So I saved myself a trip by waiting. I knew they'd mess it up. How did I know? I don't know. But I knew.

I'm not gonna untangle that one.

So I dug into my Closet O' Old Drum Crap (remarkably similar to the Tech closet...okay, it's the same one, but with different strata of junk I don't use anymore) and found a reso head for the 10" tom. It's clear. It doesn't match the theme I have going. But it'll work until I can find a black head. Probably from Clearwater or Guitar Center.

Moral: Amazon, what the hell??
It is the scent of garlic that lingers on my chocolate fingers

Offline Starfox

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Re: Random Crap 2021: The Downward Spiral Of Our Days
« Reply #17 on: April 29, 2021, 01:25:41 PM »
Quote
...it goes on like that, forever.

You forgot to mention person AAA (the modder) who decides, after weathering all that and a hard thinking, to abandon gaming altogether and go plant lettuces because at least the lettuces don't complain or have existential crisis (maybe they do but they're pretty quiet about it).

Seriously, I've seen several modders left the scene just because they were taking abuse that they were not paid for (which most people seem to forgot).


Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world. -- A. Einstein

Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: Random Crap 2021: The Downward Spiral Of Our Days
« Reply #18 on: May 06, 2021, 10:51:49 PM »
I don't blame 'em for leaving...I mean, imagine receiving death threats for not tailoring your mod to suit the psychoses of some random dipshit. :ss-nuts

Speaking of insanity, I've been somewhat distracted of late, as last week a hailstorm busted out a few of my back windows, swiss-cheesed my siding, and pummeled my roof and gutters. It also gave my car dimples (dimples may be adorable, but not on my car). There's also water damage, which the cherry on top of this shit sundae. While others in the area had a lot more damage, it's cold comfort. On the bright side, my dad's brothers deal with this type of thing beautifully. I am basically useless.

I am going through the Tums like crazy. But at least it's motivated me to seriously consider moving underground.
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Offline Silver Sorrow

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Re: Random Crap 2021: The Downward Spiral Of Our Days
« Reply #19 on: May 09, 2021, 08:57:23 PM »
So I watched some of Shadow and Bone on Netflix (might as well watch something as they're charging me $18 a month) and...

...I don't know. Every media outlet that mentioned the show treated it as if it were the second coming of Christ, but I couldn't make heads or tails out of it. Okay, there's magic, there's a girl who people don't like because she looks different, and there's a kind of steampunk thing going on...

...which wouldn't be a bad setup, but I can't understand a goddamn thing coming out of the actors' mouths! A bunch of British actors spewing out their lines as if they're all in a race to reach the end of each scene first, and I hate having to turn on subtitles just to make sense of what's going on. I made the mistake of folding towels for part of it, and was thoroughly lost. "Why is she doing that? What did he say? Why is she...wait, is this a flashback? Why...uh...oh God no."

[SCENE: A man and a woman flirt]

MAN: [insinuating smile] Dyouthinkwhatsitwatermelonfre nchfries?
WOMAN: [wincing smile] Oh, IdunnowhatthetimeisbutIthinki tmightbepatagonia!
MAN: [smooth chuckle] Tacobellcheeseonthursdaywotch erbobmexicovivalamanoflamanch a!
WOMAN: [laughs]

[END SCENE]

I gave up after 20 minutes of this. Apparently they have all this lore and backstory to establish in the first episode, a lot of exposition, a ton of character establishment and motiviation, and so on. So they gotta get through it and FAST, establishing the world to hook the viewer before their ratings crater and Netflix cancels them. So the actors have to deliver their lines like auctioneers.

It's bad enough with American actors, but the added difficulty of the British accents tend to make me especially patriotic on the 4th of July.  :ss-nono

There is an alternative, though: it involves these things called "books." The series is based on a trilogy, but...I don't know if I care enough to start another series. I already have a backlog of reading material...I mean, I never finished the third Thomas Covenant series, I'm only a third of the way through Adrienne Barbeau's autobiography, and I have yet to make it through the maze on the back of the Cap'n Crunch box. I just don't have the room for more things to read!
It is the scent of garlic that lingers on my chocolate fingers